Check in with your mates this World Mental Health Day

Posted on: 9 October 2024

“I hope that by sharing my story, people will realise they’re not alone and that help is always out there” – Charlotte Lay

Content Warning: This story includes topics of suicide, suicidal thoughts, abuse, and trauma. Please take care when reading and seek support if needed.

Charlotte Lay at Airedale Hospital where she works v2.jpgIn 2019, Charlotte Lay, 33, from Bradford, made an impulsive decision to attempt to end her own life. 5 years on, she is sharing her story in the hope it helps others to know that they’re not alone, and how much impact kindness can have on someone who is struggling.

Charlotte was on her way to work 5 years ago when she decided to take her own life. She had struggled with her mental health for years after experiencing trauma from an abusive relationship as a teenager. Charlotte was also diagnosed with major depressive disorder, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and borderline personality disorder.

“On the day of my suicide attempt, I don’t know exactly what triggered it, but it was an impulsive decision,” Charlotte said. “I had my uniform on, fully prepared for work but something just didn’t feel right. When I got off the train I just sat down on the platform. The conductor asked if I was okay and I said yes. Sensing something was off he asked again if I was sure and I said yes and the train drove away. While sitting there, I made the impulsive decision to jump from the platform.

“I walked down the tracks and sat down, waiting. I'm unsure who raised the alarm about my presence but when the next train came, it slowed and stopped far from me.”

Charlotte was approached by the driver of the train, Dave, who sat with her and spoke to her for half an hour.

“The conversation from what I can remember was just about mundane things and about both our lives, but it was enough to break the crisis. Life didn’t feel as heavy anymore.”

After giving Charlotte the space she needed, Dave was able to get her to the next platform safely where she was met by the police and signposted to local mental health services.

“The next day I made it my mission to find the man who had been so kind to me. Through Facebook and some colleagues of his, I found him.

“Now he’s my husband. We got married whilst I was 22 weeks pregnant!”Charlotte Lay and husband Dave on wedding day.jpg

Dave’s actions on that day saved Charlotte’s life. “I once asked him if he’d ever had any de-escalation training, because he was brilliant that day. He told me he hadn’t. He said he’d simply said all the things he wished he could’ve said to others before me, people he never got the chance to speak to.

“I hope that by sharing my story, people will realise that although it would be ideal if we all had specialist training to deal with a mental health crisis, we are all capable of helping by being empathic and present.

“I’m still receiving support for my mental health now, and I think I always will. But I’m so grateful to Dave for stopping that day and being so patient and understanding.”

West Yorkshire Health and Care Partnership is committed to reducing suicide rates across the region, aiming for a minimum 10% reduction over the next 5 years. This World Mental Health Day, we encourage everyone to:

  • Check in with friends and family: Reach out and ask how they’re feeling. If someone seems low, guide them to local resources like suicidepreventionwestyorkshire.co.uk.
  • Take the Zero Suicide Alliance training: This free 20-minute online course teaches you how to talk to people about suicide.

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